I was going to blog about not going to the primary series intensive that my husband is attending. This blog that I was going to write was going to be about the fun stuff I have planned while the husband is out of town.
I dropped him off at the airport at 2:30PM. Great hug, many kisses, waves, wave kisses… there he goes through security. let the fun begin.
at 6:03pm, just as I am starting the wednesday night led primary I get a text from him. “I’m a runway person” I was thinking he was waiting to deplane in Philly and just being funny, so I text back “Ekam!!” and start the class.
And then my husband sort of went missing…
This has been a big airport month for me.
Mika and Jon
to attend a wedding in Chicago. The next wedding they attend together will be their very own wedding, so this wedding I am taking them to the airport for is the last wedding they will go to as a not yet married couple. I gave them a pre-wedding gift during this ride, purple and gold socks to put on their feet once they make it through security. Might as well upgrade to colorful Fluevog socks and make the taking off the shoes thing a bonus. A big happy you guys are up next, soon we will be hugging at your very own wedding hug.
to attend a funeral for her 11 year old nephew. Harrison had an unexpected
terrible accident at home. So terrible. So sad. Joanna’s brother Jake’s first born son Harrison is suddenly no longer alive. This was the biggest and most important ride to the airport of my life. Joanna was heading into her family of origin’s most sad and horrible era. She has been through so much, she has come so far. She is my slow burn bhakti hero, and she must go back into the fire. Grow JO Grow. Be more yourself than ever before. She will be there for her family, herself and Harrison. Big supportive hug for my sweet JO.
to send her back to Philly. Joy had come to Durham to get some voice
oversound stuff for the completion of her first ever full length feature film, The Bhakti Boy. I play a newscaster in the movie named Marcy Maquire. Joy needed to re-record two lines of Marcy’s to complete a scene to get that film DONE. She also needed to spend time with Joanna to work on David’s interview book. The 24 hours Joy was here we did ashtanga, took some photos for the Little Man calendar and ate some fantastic plant-based food. I might not get to see Joy for many months so I gave her the big squeeze nuzzle type of till next we meet hug.
to send him off to a week long Primary Series Intensive with David Garrigues.
Even though I am taking Nikos to the airport he is driving because just as we are heading out the door David called me to communicate with me about my practice. Since he is about to start teaching the week long intensive I am sending Nikos to, David’s attention will be fully consumed with teaching his brains out for the nearly 30 bright eyed and bushy tailed ashtangis that will be jam packing his shala. He/ David wants to make sure I am not giving up on my asana practice. He talks me through ways to go about continuing to get the good stuff from the asana even though I am entering the too old to die young, and too young to die now era, a tough time for those of us with twenty plus years into the practice of ashtanga. As usual, it is a time of learning, investigation, research and commitment. How to navigate the retirement of some of the asana curriculum that is no longer helpful… how to continue doing ashtanga in the bodies we have in the now. Tough conversation. The theme is figuring out what to not let go of, what to keep. So the conversation is only partially about ashtanga, it is maybe really about negotiating life. I wrap up the conversation with David about being a 52 year old ashtangi. Have I mentioned that I have an actual real-life ashtanga teacher. Nikos and I are now at the airport. The big hug, the “I love you”. Nikos gets the you are truly my better half kind of hug that I can still hardly believe I am lucky enough to give. He is big and strong so I really squeeze this one.
Each trip to the airport is a vignette of my good fortune for being a person that cherises the off balance center of the relationships of life. As my mother always said, “Life is a page turner.”
At 8:15PM I am eating a bowl of soup and running a bath getting ready for an
early bedtime, I am expecting a call from Nikos. I get a call from my Mother-in-Law, Barbara. She has a special ringtone just for her so as soon as I hear that ring tone I realized, Oh my goodness Nikos has not yet called me. Where is he? Why is Barbara calling me? This is not good. “Have I heard from Nikos?”, no… except that he sent me a text about being stuck on a runway. I had thought he was waiting to deplane in Philly. But now she is saying she thinks maybe he is still in Durham or still in the air, or where could he be, what is happening? Barbara is an authorized card carrying official member of the Way of the Worrier Clan. Even for her, she was very worried. I got right on the worry train. The kind of worry that is dreamy, the kind that is almost soothing because it has a wellspring of momentum. It rolls, it waves.
thank goodness we experienced that fantastic hug at the airport. he was the best husband ever. so glad he cleaned the basement out yesterday, and he fixed my windshield wiper. he was so wonderful. so glad I squeezed him so tight and looked into his eyes and said “i love you”. during his funeral I will be strong for Barbara (mother-in-law) I will hold her hand and thank her for having had such a terrific son. I will be the fantastic wife he thinks I am. instead of making his funeral about how much i will miss him and about how much my life will now suck because he has died, i am going to squeeze my mother-in-law’s hand during nikos’s funeral and be grateful that such a wonderful man was born. i will be a beacon of strength and love for how much my life has been enriched for being among the special people that know and love The Neek.
at 9:30PM his sister texts
“he’s here”. He had made it safe and sound to his sister’s awesome loft in downtown/chinatown Philly. He was alive, his phone was dead. His plane had sat on the Raleigh-Durham Airport runway for 5 or 6 hours because of some air traffic jams caused by a fire at the Boston airport in the Delta Hub.
So instead of writing the super fun blog about the pumpkin party at Mika and Jon’s, the Music event at Mercury Studio, the day in the country at Mimi’s incredible farmhouse and ceramic studio, my vegan lunch with Lina and Shannon , the visit to the Miro exhibit at the Nasher, attending the North Carolina State Fair, the haircut (ray) & facial (amanda) I am getting at Carmen Carmen Salon at Belk’s cuz I trade ashtanga instruction for spa time, this blog is about gratitude. This blog is about being alive. This blog is about being among those that get to give and receive hugs that reveal the happy, sad, hardworking, difficult, tender, hand holding, rib squeezing meaning of life.
airport hugs. bring them on.